Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Babble, Shmabble

Title: Queen of Babble
Author: Meg Cabot

Lizzie is a recent college grad with a degree in fashion history; formerly pudgy, she’s lost some weight recently. She lives for vintage clothing. That, and her boyfriend Andrew, a former exchange student she started to “date” 2 days before he went back to England. Three months later, they’ve talked on the phone, and now she’s off to visit him for a month!

Of course, when she arrives, she (1) doesn’t recognize him, (2) hates his red Michael Jackson-esque jacket, and (3) feels very strongly that him registering for unemployment while working as a waiter is wrong. It took a few days to reach all these conclusions. During those days, she also learned how many other things he lied to her about – like having a prestigious teaching internship (see: waiter, above), having a flat (living with his parents and 2 brothers in a 3-bedroom flat; Lizzie has to sleep in the laundry room), and needing money for school fees (or perhaps to pay off his gambling debts because they’re threatening to break his legs).

At this point, Lizzie decides to leave. Her best friend, Shari, and her boyfriend, Chaz, happen to be spending the same month in France at a vineyard owned by the father of one of Chaz’s prep school friends, Luke, so, even though she doesn’t speak French (and had never even left the US before going to see Andrew), she hops on a train and heads for her friends. She’s still freaking out, and vents all to the attractive young man sitting next to her (Jean-Luc), down to how she gave Andrew a blowjob because he couldn’t perform in the laundry room, and how she wished she could take it back because he didn’t deserve it.

As you may have guessed, Jean-Luc is actually Luke, Chaz’s friend, though he doesn’t tell her this until they both get off the train at the same small town (because once he figured it out, he couldn’t come up with a good way to bring it up in the conversation without making her feel awkward – like letting her keep talking would make it better…).

At the vineyard, mayhem ensues because Luke’s cousin is getting married there in a few days, and she’s a crazy Texan sorority girl. His mom and aunt come in for the wedding, and they’re just as bad. Luke’s girlfriend, Dominique, is also there. She’s a money-grubbing bitch with fake boobs. She wants to turn the gorgeous old vineyard into a spa where rich women can recover from plastic surgery. Dominique’s not right for Luke. Lizzie is!

Dominique realizes that Luke and Lizzie have a connection, and becomes even bitchier. Shari, being the best friend, sees that Lizzie has fallen for Luke, and both encourages and cautions her.

The crazy bride’s wedding dress turns out to be a monstrosity, and Dominique volunteers Lizzie to fix it with about 18 hours to go before the ceremony, figuring that she’ll fail. Lizzie, whilst playing in the attic with Luke, had found trunks of vintage couture clothing, including a Givenchy gown. The wedding dress turned out to be unsalvageable, but, fortunately, she could clean up and fit the dress to the bride and save the day!

The bride’s grungy brother is in a band, and they just got a record contract. That works out for everyone – Dominique, who’s looking for someone rich and pliable, jumps ship and runs off with him. Simultaneously, Lizzie and Luke are furthering their “connection” in the vineyard’s cask room…

Happy ending for everyone!


posted by ket at 9:36 PM


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